Nearly two weeks after the previous couple finalized their divorce and dropped the their twin restraining orders, the Complete Bellas star took to her The Nikki & Brie Present podcast to interrupt her silence on the troublesome breakup.

Whereas Nikki referred to as the break up “heartbreaking” the previous WWE star, who shares 4-year-old son, Matteo, with Artem, admitted she had been “play[ing] up” her relationship with the dance professional within the public eye.

“I wished [him] to heal. I wished [him] to get assist … as a result of that is what my son, [Matteo] deserves,” Nikki defined.

She continued, “It is unhappy. [The relationship] hasn’t been nice for a very long time. I actually performed it up like issues had been lots higher than they had been within the public eye. I felt like, ‘If I can simply put this particular person on a pedestal … possibly they’ll consider that in themselves.’”

Nikki additionally famous that she did not need “one other failed public relationship,” referencing her break up from former fiancé, John Cena.

Her return to the podcast was an an emotional one, with Nikki sitting down with sister Brie Garcia to unpack the break up through the Dec. 2 episode.

“I first wish to simply thank everybody, the listeners, you, household, mates, coworkers, individuals I have never talked to in a very long time, only for all of the love and help, for the respect of privateness and house,” Nikki stated on the prime of the present.

As she famous, “The previous few months, I disconnected from social media, from the world. And I simply knew that I wanted to disconnect, as a result of first issues first, I am a mother and my son’s safety and privateness is a very powerful. So I used to be going to do no matter it took for that, most significantly, after which simply needing house, for therapeutic, for dealing with trauma, head on, all of that. So it has been powerful. It has been actually powerful. I have been heartbroken, unhappy.”

The 41-year-old went on share how she was coping with the aftermath of the break up, sharing that she may’ve by no means predicted this when the pair tied the knot two years in the past.

“You dream of getting this household, and you’ve got this unbelievable love,” the previous WWE star continued, “and it simply goes the opposite manner. And also you go from having an amazing love story to having a horrible one, and—by no means noticed any of it coming. You already know, so far as what the ending could be. So it is simply been a wrestle.”

Nikki’s perception into her journey comes three months after the Dancing With the Stars professional — who shares 4-year-old son Matteo with the WWE star — was arrested on a suspicion of felony home violence cost.

Artem was arrested on Aug. 29 following an incident at his and Nikki’s house. In accordance with a September press launch, native prosecutors determined to not press fees after evaluating the proof.

That very same month, Nikki filed for divorce from Artem, 42, itemizing his arrest as their official date of separation, per courtroom paperwork obtained by TMZ.

Whereas Nikki did not delve into all the main points about what occurred between her and Artem, she did share how she felt within the aftermath.

“I have been so shocked, like past phrases, and it has been heartbreaking,” she defined. “You lose your urge for food, you cry lots. After which I additionally stepped up and made certain every thing was okay for Matteo. And so it is simply been — I do not even know what different phrases to make use of.”

Now, Nikki is concentrated on shifting ahead, and the pair’s son.

“The one factor that I’ve realized disconnecting from the world, it is when you recognize the reality, nothing else issues,” Nikki shared. “So when a few of you’d come to me and inform me what individuals had been saying or what was on the market, it might have an effect on me not directly, however as a result of I do know the reality, and I truly lived it, it did not have a giant impact on me.”

“All I must do is deal with my therapeutic. I must deal with Matteo’s therapeutic,” she added.

As for Artem, he is fought again in opposition to Nikki’s account of their confrontation, alleging in his filed response that she was the aggressor throughout their confrontation in August. The next month, Artem spoke out, noting that the previous couple’s son Matteo remained his principal focus.

“He’s my world, and being his father is the best blessing in my life,” Artem stated in a Sept. 25 assertion. “All alongside, my principal concern has been for him.”

He added, “I’m dedicated to persevering with to offer him with the love, help, and care he wants as we transfer ahead. I’m hopeful that securing an equal custody association will assist us transfer on.”